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C-Come on, Sister,
you have to sit up properly.

- Hetaro
ACDB.ca
♀♂
CHARACTERS
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A-Z

Quotes by Kazuma Satou


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ALL 1401 Quotes

 

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There we go...
 

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I normally shut myself in at home,
 

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but unusually for me,
today I made up my mind to go out.
 

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All to get my hands on
the first-run limited edition
 

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of a popular online game
that goes on sale today.
 

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A five-hour round trip!
I'm glad I was able to buy it.
 

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In-store exclusives, official or not,
really are playing dirty.
 

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This sunlight is my worst enemy
after three straight all-nighters.
 

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Time to get home and play the hell out of this.
 

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A girl from my high school?
 

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Look out! That truck's going to—
 

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Why would I choose now, of all times,
 

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to do something so out of character?
 

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Just one question...
 

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What about the girl I
pushed out of harm's way?
 

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Thank goodness.
 

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That means my death wasn't in vain.
 

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Huh?
 

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Huh? Wait a second.
 

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"Tractor"?
 

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Huh? Then what happened?
 

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Did I die by getting plowed over by a tractor?
 

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I died of shock?!
 

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I've never even met this girl
before. What's her deal?
 

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Stop! I don't wanna hear it!
 

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I don't wanna hear it! I don't wanna hear it!
 

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Stop! Stop!
 

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Damn her!
 

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Huh?
 

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What?
 

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Uh, right...
 

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Huh?
 

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I see...
 

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What's the point in sending me there
if I'm just going to be killed?
 

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Um, I want to ask something.
 

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Will I be able to speak this
other world's language?
 

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I just heard you mention
something really serious.
 

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What do you mean, "poof"?
 

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Yes, you did.
 

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This is my gamer's intuition talking,
 

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but all of the abilities and equipment
here are totally broken!
 

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If I'm going to a world where magic exists,
I absolutely have to try it out!
 

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I-I'm not an otaku!
 

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And I died after leaving my house,
so I'm not a shut-in, either!
 

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Damn her!
 

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Getting all cocky just because
she's a little bit cute...
 

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"Hurry up and decide," huh?
 

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I'll do just that, then.
 

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Pick one thing to bring to
this parallel world, right?
 

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Okay, I pick you.
 

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How does it feel to get dragged away with
the guy you treated like a total idiot?
 

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You've been designated as the one
thing I'll be bringing along,
 

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so if you're a goddess,
use your godly powers
 

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or whatever to make my
life as easy as possible!
 

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Whoa, for real?!
 

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It's a parallel world.
 

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Hey, this really is a parallel world!
 

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W-Wait, I'm really going to be using magic
 

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and going on adventures
in this world from now on?
 

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Goodbye, shut-in life! Hello, new world!
 

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I can really start anew in this world!
 

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Hey, shut up.
 

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What am I going to do if everyone
thinks I'm friends with a crazy woman?
 

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More importantly, isn't there something you're
supposed to give me at a time like this?
 

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Look at what I'm wearing. I'm in a tracksuit.
 

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Here I am in a fantasy world,
and all I have is a single tracksuit.
 

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Isn't there a bare minimum of
starter equipment I should—
 

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Wh-What the heck?! Stop! Stop it!
 

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I get it, okay?! I'm sorry!
 

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If you hate it that much,
then you can go home.
 

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I'll work out the rest on my own.
 

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Hey, calm down, Goddess.
 

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Times like these call for guilds.
 

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Going to places like that to gather
intel is what you do in RPGs.
 

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All right! Let's go, Goddess.
 

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I get it.
 

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If you're a goddess,
 

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wouldn't you know where we can
find an adventurer's guild?
 

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This girl's useless...
 

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Looks like this is the place.
 

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Thank you.
 

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Oh, we've actually come a long way,
and we just got into town.
 

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I want to become an adventurer
to fight the Devil King's army, too.
 

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Listen, Aqua.
 

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Today we'll register with a guild
and find a place to stay the night.
 

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Exactly. All right, let's go.
 

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Stop calling me a shut-in NEET, you bitch.
 

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Don't lump "shut-in" and "NEET" together.
 

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Um, we'd like to become adventurers.
 

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Sure, sure...
 

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Huh? Registration fee?
 

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Do you have any money?
 

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This girl's useless...
 

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Um, I'm still thinking about it...
 

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Hey, what should we do?
 

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We've already hit a roadblock.
 

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Normally we'd get a minimal
amount of equipment
 

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and enough to cover basic
living expenses, at least.
 

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This is totally inhospitable.
 

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Don't call me a shut-in NEET.
 

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Y-Yeah...
 

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Um, we've brought the registration fee.
 

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Something told me she didn't want
to make eye contact with us.
 

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Like this?
 

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Here it comes!
 

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Now my tremendous latent
abilities will be made apparent,
 

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and there'll be an uproar
throughout the guild!
 

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Hey, she's disapproving of my adventurer's
lifestyle right off the bat.
 

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What's going on?
 

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U-Um,
 

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make my primary job "adventurer," please.
 

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W-Well, you can always
change jobs when you level up!
 

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Y-You're right!
 

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The weakest job, huh?
 

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No event like this is going to happen for me?
 

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I thought you absolutely hated all this.
 

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Well, anyway, everything thus far has
been basically character creation.
 

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Now our adventure is finally about to begin!
 

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Wait, this isn't right!
 

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No, wait a second!
 

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No need! It's not that!
 

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W-We're sorry!
 

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We didn't come here to be laborers.
 

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Her intelligence stat was
lower than a human's.
 

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All of the monsters near town have
been long since exterminated.
 

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With no monsters, there's no need
for anyone to give us any fetch quests.
 

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I didn't want to learn something so realistic...
 

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It's nothing.
 

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We're level one. We don't even
have full sets of equipment.
 

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I feel very uneasy about this.
 

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That's right. You are a goddess, after all.
 

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And so our adventure began,
 

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for real this... time.
 

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Mom, I've come to a parallel world.
I feel refreshed, as if I've been reborn.
I've found a home and a job, and I'm full of energy.
And best of all, a goddess has come along with me.
So please don't worry about me.
I'll be all right... I'll be all right... Probably...
 

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This isn't how I imagined
life in a parallel world would be.
 

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Income is unstable for a beginner adventurer,
 

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so sleeping in a stable is normal...
 

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Now that I think about it, adventurers are
 

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basically insignificant,
job-hopping part-timers.
 

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Job-hoppers can't even
 

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afford to stay in hotels in
a place as affluent as Japan.
 

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Minimum wage?
 

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Fair labor standards?
 

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What are those? Are they tasty?
 

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Don't "good morning" me.
 

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It's almost noon.
 

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Weren't we going on a kill quest?
 

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What happened to her saying
I could "count on" her yesterday?
 

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So, wasn't this world supposed to be under
 

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attack by the Devil King, and in a huge crisis?
 

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This is as peaceful as it gets!
 

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There's no sign of evil influence anywhere.
 

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I guess...
 

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Something tells me you said
something similar yesterday.
 

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But it is true that you're a goddess.
 

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I'm counting on you.
 

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All right, let's put together the most
basic equipment we can and head out.
 

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Yeah!
 

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W-We're sorry!
 

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Save me, Aqua!
 

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Save me— Whoa!
 

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I'll bury her later, before I head home!
 

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Giant Toads.
 

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These guys can't be dismissed as simple frogs.
 

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When mating season comes,
 

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they show up in settlements with lots of prey,
 

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and swallow the farmers' goats whole
 

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to build up strength in
preparation to lay their eggs.
 

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In fact, farmers and children
from the settlement
 

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tend to go missing during these
frogs' mating season every year.
 

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By the way, their meat is somewhat tough,
 

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but it's so light and refreshing
 

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that it's a highly coveted ingredient.
 

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Huh?
 

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Don't get eaten!
 

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Good thing the frog stopped moving
around while it was eating you.
 

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She smells disgusting!
 

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Um, let's head back for today.
 

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These guys are more than we can handle.
 

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Let's do this after we get
more equipment together.
 

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She's normally happy as can be to work
up a sweat with the older workers,
 

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and looks forward to her post-bath dinner
 

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and a good, hard drink most of all.
 

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She even drools while she sleeps in the stable.
 

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It's a little late to complain
about being "dirty"...
 

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Hey! Wait, Aqua!
 

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Aqua!
 

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5,000 eris per frog...
 

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We risked our lives and earned no more
than part-time construction work pays.
 

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You say "allies,"
 

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but we're beginners with
no decent equipment.
 

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Do you really think anyone
will party up with us?
 

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Swallow your food!
Swallow your food, then talk!
 

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Oh?
 

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More than half a day passed after
we posted the recruitment offer,
 

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but no prospective future heroes showed up.
 

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Hey, let's lower the bar a little.
 

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Recruiting only members in
advanced jobs is way too strict.
 

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At this rate, not a single person will come.
 

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I mean, you might have an advanced job,
but I'm still in the weakest.
 

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I'll feel ashamed if I'm completely
surrounded by the elite.
 

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Um...
 

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Huh?
 

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Are you just here to poke fun at us?
 

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Hey, what's wrong?!
 

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I don't mind treating you,
 

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but what's with the eyepatch?
 

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If you're injured, why don't
we have her heal you?
 

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Her one strong suit is healing magic.
 

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So it's like a seal?
 

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Oh?
 

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Sorry. I thought you were making fun of us.
 

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You were talking gibberish
and gave us that weird name.
 

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By the way, what are your parents' names?
 

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So this girl's clan has a lot
of good magicians, right?
 

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Yeah, this girl's magic stat is high...
 

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Well, go ahead and order
something, "arch wizard."
 

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Right. I'll do it.
 

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Two at once?
 

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Target the frog in the distance with your magic.
 

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As for the closer one...
 

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Hey, let's go, Aqua.
 

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You are a former something-or-other, right?
 

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Show off some of your former ability.
 

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Oh, she just calls herself one. It's rather sad.
 

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She blurts out stuff like this at times,
 

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but it's best not to pay it any mind.
 

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That's a goddess for you.
 

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She put her life on the line to buy us time.
 

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Wow...
 

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So this is magic?
 

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Did the explosion wake it up?
 

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Megumin! Let's back off for now and—
 

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Huh?
 

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Huh?
 

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Y-You guys! Don't get eaten!
 

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That's information I didn't need to know.
 

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You're banned from using explosion
magic, except in emergencies.
 

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Just do your best with some
other magic from now on.
 

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Huh?
 

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For real?
 

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What the heck would you use
"party trick" skills for?
 

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Damn, this magician's hopeless.
 

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The fact that Aqua sympathizes
with her proves it.
 

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Based on these two fights,
 

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I highly suspect this goddess
is completely useless, too.
 

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Frankly, I don't need any more
problem children to put up with.
 

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I see!
 

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I'm sure the path ahead of you
will be thorny, but do your best!
 

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Once we reach the guild,
we'll split the reward evenly,
 

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then when we get a chance,
let's meet up somewhere—
 

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No, no, no.
 

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Such mighty power would be wasted on a
puny party of novice adventurers like us.
 

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No, no, no, no.
 

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What kind of magician can
only use a spell once a day?!
 

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This girl's got a surprisingly
strong grip, for a magician!
 

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Hey, let go!
 

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You got dumped by another party, didn't you?!
 

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I said let go!
 

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Heck, if we go into a dungeon, there won't
be enough room to use explosion magic!
 

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You get more useless by the second!
 

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I-It's not like that!
 

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All right, I get it!
 

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Glad to have you aboard!
 

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I went up four levels all at once.
 

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You really do get stronger just
by defeating some monsters...
 

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110,000... Split between three people,
 

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that comes to around 36,000 eris each.
 

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We nearly lost our lives for
a reward of 36,000 each.
 

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It's not worth it.
 

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I checked the other quests just in case, but...
 

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Yeah, it's no use.
 

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I want to go back to Japan.
 

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The ally we recruited is a lost cause.
 

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Living in this world isn't gonna be easy.
 

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Um...
 

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We are!
 

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Though, I wouldn't really recommend it...
 

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A female knight.
 

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An extraordinarily beautiful one at that!
 

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She's such a gorgeous older
woman, I got so nervous
 

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that my voice squeaked a little.
 

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It's an adverse effect of
my long life as a shut-in!
 

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Dad, I've gotten totally used to my life here in this parallel world.
My days are busy, spent with my dependable companions.
Work is going well, and I've been commended,
saying I'll be promoted extraordinarily quickly.
I'm so content with life that I never feel
exhausted, lonely, or resentful.
It's true. I'm telling the truth, okay?
 

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Um...
 

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Oh, uh...
 

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They were swallowed by
Giant Toads, and the mucus—
 

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What's with this woman knight?
 

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Her eyes are scaring me...
 

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She's setting off my danger radar.
 

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It's telling me something's up with her,
just like Aqua and Megumin.
 

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No, I'd advise against it.
 

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It's hard to say how useful
one of our members is,
 

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another can only use her magic once per day,
 

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and I'm the lowest job class.
 

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Our party's total trash,
 

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so I'd recommend you look elsewhe— Ow, ow, ow!
 

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Looks like my sensor was spot-on.
 

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Her face is too close!
 

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The negative effects of my long life
as a shut-in are kicking in now?!
 

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No, that isn't it!
 

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This is just too stimulating for
an adolescent virgin like me!
 

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Stay calm... Don't be seduced
by her womanly charms!
 

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No.
 

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I could never use a woman as a shield.
 

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Well, we get eaten by
monsters in every battle.
 

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Oh, I get it.
 

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It's not just her abilities.
She's hopeless to the core.
 

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I was so worn out, I slept until noon...
 

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Isn't that a party trick skill,
you low-grade goddess?
 

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You can learn skills with the
points you've saved up, huh?
 

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I'll have to be careful not to
use them on any weird skills.
 

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Does that mean if I have you teach me,
 

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I could learn to use explosion magic, too?
 

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Her face is too close...
 

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Hey, calm... calm down, little girl!
 

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Besides, I only have three points right now...
 

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Huh?
 

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I wonder if there's some quick and easy skill...
 

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One that'll be a good value,
that doesn't take many points to learn.
 

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Oh, no!
 

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N-No need to worry!
 

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I was trying to turn her down gently.
 

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Looks like my intentions didn't
get through to her at all!
 

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I refuse.
 

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Huh? That made her happy?
 

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She's dangerous!
 

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Um, and you are?
 

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Thank goodness.
 

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This one seems like a
relatively competent person.
 

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Huh?
 

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That's cheap!
 

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All right, please do!
 

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Excuse me! One ice-cold drink
for this lady over here!
 

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Right! I'm ready, Chris-san!
 

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Hey! My coin pouch!
 

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Huh...
 

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A high tuition fee, huh?
 

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Still,
 

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this is exactly the sort of exchange between
rowdy adventurers that I've been craving!
 

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At long last,
 

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it's my first adventure-like event
since coming to this world!
 

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Sure!
 

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Enemy Detection: one point.
 

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Lurk: one point.
 

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Pilfer: one point.
 

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Nature's Beauty...
 

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"Nature's Beauty"?
 

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Five points for a measly party trick?
 

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That's steep!
 

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Yeah, I won't need this.
 

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All right!
 

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Whatever I steal from you,
don't cry about it!
 

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Wow!
 

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That's dirty!
 

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Damn.
 

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This really was enlightening.
 

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This isn't Japan.
 

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It's survival of the fittest in this world.
 

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Any gullible fool who gets
tricked has himself to blame.
 

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I'll do it!
 

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Steal!
 

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All right! Looks like it worked!
 

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What's this?
 

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Oh! This is just as great a success!
 

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I hit the jackpot!
 

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KONOSUBA!
 

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Actually...
 

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Hey, what are you blurting out?!
 

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Whoa, hold on! Hold on!
 

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You're not wrong, but seriously, hold on!
 

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Hey!
 

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The eyes of every female adventurer
around us are turning stone-cold!
 

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Seriously, wait a second!
 

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Well, see for yourself.
 

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Here I go!
 

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Steal!
 

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What's this?
 

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What happened?
 

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H-Huh? That's strange.
 

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What you steal should be random...
 

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No, thanks.
 

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This chick is definitely the hopeless type.
 

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I can't let any more weirdos into our party.
 

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Crap...
 

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I really didn't want to
let these two meet her.
 

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All right, I guess I can play that card.
 

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Darkness,
 

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there's something I have to tell you.
 

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The thing is...
 

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Aqua and I may not look like much,
 

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but we seriously intend to defeat the Devil King.
 

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Our adventure is bound to become
more and more rigorous.
 

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For you in particular, Darkness.
 

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If a female knight like you
 

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were to be captured by the
Devil King, it'd be bad news.
 

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You'd be sure to suffer a horrendous fate!
 

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Wait, what?
 

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I-I'll take care of this one later!
 

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You listen up, too, Megumin.
 

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Our opponent is the Devil King.
 

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We're picking a fight with the
strongest being in this world.
 

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There's no need to force yourself
to stay in a party like—
 

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This one's a lost cause, too...
 

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What should I do?
 

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I made these two embarrassing
girls even more motivated.
 

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You should be the most motivated of all.
 

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In fact, this concerns you most of all.
 

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What is it this time?
 

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What is it? What's coming?
 

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What's the emergency quest?
 

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Is it a monster attack?
 

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Huh?
 

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What the hell is this?!
 

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Can I just go home and go to bed?
 

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She's not hitting a single one!
 

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Darkness!
 

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Her armor!
 

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Darkness, you...
 

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She's enjoying it?!
 

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No! You guys have it all wrong!
 

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She's gonna give people the wrong idea, too!
 

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Yes, you can!
 

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I refuse to accept this.
 

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How can a simple cabbage stir-fry be so tasty?
 

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I didn't come to a parallel
world to fight cabbage.
 

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Is that important?
 

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Really?
 

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Really?
 

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Really?
 

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Don't let her hit you directly!
 

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Steal!
 

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Oh, shut up!
 

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Jeez, how did things end up like this?
 

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I wouldn't have any real reason to refuse
if she were a normal ally, either.
 

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She's gorgeous, after all. But still...
 

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She's one of those people...
 

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A total masochist.
 

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Although this seems like a perfect
lineup, it's anything but.
 

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I foresee nothing but hardships in our future...
 

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To my teacher at school.
I'm currently learning in a parallel world...
The workings of its society, what it is to be human, and what it means to be alive.
It makes me grateful that all the wonderful events
transpiring here make me grow as a person.
I'm so grateful, it makes me tear up.
There isn't a single night I haven't soaked my pillow in tears.
Uh, I mean that in a good way. A good way, okay?
 

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All right...
 

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Create Water!
 

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Well, that's about what I'd
expect from elementary magic.
 

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Now that I've learned a skill,
maybe I'm a bit more of an adventurer.
 

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Looks like the sort of armor some
newly-rich aristocrat's son would wear.
 

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I don't have time to pay
attention to you right now.
 

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Do something about that pervert who's
well on her way to surpassing you.
 

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Is it? I wouldn't know.
 

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Oh, she's coming this way. This isn't good.
 

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About a million.
 

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Yes.
 

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Thanks to the quest that was
sprung on us out of the blue,
 

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I suddenly obtained a small fortune.
 

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Many of the cabbages I harvested
 

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were apparently packed with lots of XP.
 

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I guess high luck makes all the difference.
 

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If nothing praiseworthy about me
comes to mind, don't force it.
 

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What do I care?
 

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You're the one who suggested we each
keep our rewards for ourselves!
 

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You're real scum.
 

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Shut up, you useless goddess!
 

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I'm going to use this money to escape
life in the stables once and for all!
 

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Got it! All right, I got it!
 

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I'll lend you the money, so shut up!
 

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Damn her...
 

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It's elementary, but I did
acquire a magic skill.
 

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I was thinking of going for a
sword mage style, with no shield.
 

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They're not on the same page at all!
 

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Okay, it's the giant toads' mating season,
 

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and I hear they're infesting
areas near the city...
 

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Oh, these two have been traumatized by frogs.
 

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They got eaten head-first
and covered in slime.
 

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You're turned on right now, aren't you?
 

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Huh? What's going on?
 

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There are hardly any requests.
 

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No! No way!
 

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What's this all about?
 

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There are only high-difficulty quests left!
 

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Huh?
 

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What?
 

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So this means that
 

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until capable adventurers and knights
are sent here from the imperial capital,
 

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we won't be able to find any decent work?
 

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A thrilling adventure in a parallel world, huh?
 

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Say, if you want to do magical training,
can't you go on your own?
 

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Is she
 

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going to make me tag along for this every day?
 

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Hey, right here's fine, isn't it?
 

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Just use your magic on
whatever and let's go back.
 

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You just said "again," didn't you?
 

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Did they get mad and call you a
nuisance because of the noise?
 

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Guess we have no choice...
 

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It's so eerie.
 

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Uh, yeah...
 

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And that's how
 

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my new daily routine with Megumin began.
 

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Left dead broke, Aqua worked hard
at her part-time job every day.
 

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Darkness said she was going to do weight
training back at her family home for a while.
 

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Megumin, who had nothing in particular to do,
 

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commuted to that abandoned castle every day
and kept unleashing explosion magic on it.
 

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On cold, rainy evenings...
 

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On calm, early afternoons,
right after lunch...
 

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On invigorating, early morning walks...
 

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I'd give that one 60 points, I think.
 

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It was lacking in volume.
 

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No matter the occasion,
 

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Megumin unleashed magic upon that
abandoned castle every day.
 

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and eventually came to
understand the quality
 

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I kept close, observing her magic,
 

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of each day's explosion magic.
 

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It feels pretty good today.
 

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The explosion's shock waves practically
reverberate through my flesh and bones,
 

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and yet the delayed vibrations of
the air seem to stroke my skin.
 

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Nice explosion!
 

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It could be fun to acquire it in
the future, if I can afford to.
 

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The future, huh?
 

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Hey, Aqua, I don't want to say this, but...
 

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To be blunt, I'm starting to think we're
incapable of taking down the Devil King.
 

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Listen.
 

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I never had any amazing powers like
the protagonists in fairy tales do.
 

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Shouldn't some group endowed with
powerful abilities, equipment,
 

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and so forth be sent in to fight
the Devil King's army instead?
 

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Save lines like that for after you've
done something a goddess would do,
 

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like guiding the hero or buying
time by sealing the Devil King
 

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until the hero can stand on his own.
 

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You deadbeat who's only
useful for party tricks!
 

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That's the situation, so come up with some
profitable business that's simple to do.
 

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Also, hurry up and teach me recovery magic,
the last thing you've got going for you.
 

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Why you little...
 

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Hey, what's going on?
 

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He looks crazy strong!
 

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One of the Devil King's top leaders
 

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was utterly enraged with us.
 

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When did this turn into a strategy?
 

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Hey.
 

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Huh?!
 

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Darkness!
 

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Damn, he got us! A death sentence?
 

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Are you all right?
 

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I don't even want to understand
what Darkness is talking about.
 

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Yes, I'm Kazuma.
 

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Huh?
 

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Yes, yes, I'm Kazuma.
 

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Stop! Don't go!
 

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You're bothering that Dullahan guy!
 

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Pitiful...
 

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Hey, where do you think you're going?
 

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You know I'm going with you.
 

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If you go alone, you'll use
your magic on some peon,
 

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and then it'll be all over.
 

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Besides,
 

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I'm the fool who went with you every day
 

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and didn't realize the castle belonged
to one of their leaders.
 

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Hey, Darkness! We'll definitely
do something about your curse!
 

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So rest assured—
 

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Huh?
 

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Megumin and I were so excited.
 

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Give us back our motivation...
 

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This money is meaningless.
 

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Feeling satisfied with just a few coins,
 

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taking care of a useless goddess...
 

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This is not the parallel world life I wished for!
 

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Fighting ferocious dragons
with a cursed or holy sword,
 

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being lauded as a chosen hero,
 

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love blossoming with a party member...
 

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Isn't that how it's supposed to be?
 

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This is one pitiful self-proclaimed goddess.
 

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I'm sure I'll run out of money eventually, too,
 

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so go find a decent-looking quest for us.
 

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That's not "all right"!
 

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What are you trying to accept?!
 

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"There's a place where a manticore and
a griffin are fighting over territory.
 

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Please kill both of them.
 

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The reward is 500,000 eris."
 

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Are you stupid?!
 

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I was right to come check on her.
 

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I nearly let her accept a
ridiculously high-level quest!
 

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Are you actually capable of purifying water?
 

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Goddess of party tricks, right?
 

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If you accept it alone, you can keep
the whole reward for yourself.
 

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That's what this is about?
 

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How long will it take?
 

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About five minutes?
 

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That's long!
 

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How will you go about purifying it, anyway?
 

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I see.
 

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Hey, Aqua.
 

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I think I know a way you
can purify the lake safely.
 

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My strategy is rock-solid.
 

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What're you unsatisfied with?
 

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By no means did we come here to abandon
this worthless goddess in the lake.
 

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She'll be able to touch and purify
 

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the water from inside the safety of the cage.
 

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Aqua! Tell us if anything happens!
 

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We'll reel you in, cage and all!
 

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You know, you're being awfully reserved today.
 

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Huh?
 

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Normally, you'd say something chuuni-ish
 

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and try to blow the monsters away, lake and all.
 

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You always fire it off all over
the place for no reason...
 

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Hey, Aqua!
 

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How's purifying the lake coming along?
 

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You'll catch a chill if you're
in the water too long!
 

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If you need to go to the
bathroom, let us know!
 

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Did you used to be idols or something?
 

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Darkness, don't try so hard to deny it.
 

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You two insist you don't use the bathroom,
 

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so next time we'll accept a quest
that'll take longer than a day,
 

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and we'll just see whether you use it or not.
 

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Hey, that line is bound to trigger a flag!
 

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Since the alligators showed up,
 

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Aqua's not only using her
godly purification ability,
 

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but is also using purification magic
as if her life depended on it.
 

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Aqua! Let us know if you want to give up!
 

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We'll pull the cage in by
the chain and run away!
 

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Don't you dare.
 

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Aqua, are you okay?
 

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Hey, Aqua.
 

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Aqua-san?
 

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Hey.
 

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Hey, I'm talking to you! What's wrong?
 

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If that's enough to make you cry,
you should've retired from the quest.
 

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Come on, we're going home.
 

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Hey, Aqua. We talked it over,
 

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and we don't need any reward for this.
 

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C-Come on, get out of the cage already.
 

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The alligators are gone.
 

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What did you say?
 

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It looks like this quest
traumatized Aqua yet again.
 

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Hey, Aqua,
 

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we're in the city now,
so stop singing that song.
 

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Just transporting a woman on
her knees in a beat-up cage
 

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is already drawing everyone's attention.
 

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In fact, get out of there already!
 

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She's just like I used to be...
 

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Oh, nothing, never mind.
 

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Huh?
 

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You know him, don't you?
He was calling you a goddess.
 

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Do something!
 

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Yes!
 

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She didn't seriously forget
she's a goddess, did she?
 

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Huh?
 

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Because she didn't want to get out of it.
 

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This jerk just says whatever he wants.
 

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He doesn't even know Aqua all that well!
 

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Don't do that. I'll die, too.
 

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I'm sure this guy has
 

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lived a life free of worry
with that Cursed Sword Gram
 

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that he got as a perk when reincarnating.
 

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I worked my way up from square one,
 

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so why must I get lectured by a guy like him?
 

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Also, these girls are "excellent"?
 

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I've
 

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never once
 

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seen the slightest
 

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glimpse of
 

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that!
 

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Um,
 

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it sounds like my allies unanimously
don't want to join your party.
 

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Bye, then.
 

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Would you move aside?
 

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What now? He's the type
that won't listen to anyone.
 

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I can see where this is going.
 

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I knew it.
 

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All right, I'm in. Here I go!
 

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Steal!
 

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That'll teach you to say whatever you please.
 

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Are you two this guy's allies?
 

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This cheater with a cursed sword
 

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who challenged a novice adventurer with
weak gear to a match is the real coward!
 

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Huh?
 

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For real?
 

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Well, I have it now, so I guess I'll keep it.
 

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I'm an advocate of true gender equality,
 

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a guy who has no problem doling out
a drop kick to a female opponent.
 

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Don't think I'll go easy on you.
 

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I'll unleash my Steal ability
right here in public.
 

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So, what'll it be?
 

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Come on. Come on!
 

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Uh, no...
 

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Is she never satisfied until
she's caused a commotion?
 

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Hey, wait! Tell me who's spreading that around!
 

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Didn't she say 200,000 earlier?
 

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I sold it.
 

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This money is meaningless.
 

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The time is right.
 

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It might be okay to tell Megumin and Darkness.
 

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Huh?
 

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Him again?
 

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What?
 

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What?
 

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Why?
 

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We're not firing explosion
magic at you anymore...
 

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Huh?!
 

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You?!
 

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Don't say that while fidgeting!
 

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Besides, you can't move after
unleashing your magic!
 

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Which means you must've had an accomplice...
 

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You?!
 

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No, it looked pretty effective to me.
 

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He went "Gah!" and all.
 

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I bet he's freaked out because your magic
was more effective than he expected.
 

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He did go "Yah!" and all.
I think it was very effective.
 

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Maybe the lost undead are instinctively
seeking salvation from a goddess?
 

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Megumin! Can't you nail that swarm
of undead with explosion magic?
 

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You idiot! Don't come this way!
 

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If you go the other way,
I'll treat you to dinner tonight!
 

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Damn, there are too many of them!
 

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Wait a second.
 

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Megumin, ready your magic stand by!
 

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Aqua! Follow me!
 

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Megumin!
 

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Now!
 

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Need me to carry you?
 

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Megumin is out of magic power.
 

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Aqua's magic isn't enough
to deliver a fatal blow.
 

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What do we do?
 

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The city's ace in the hole?
 

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Stop!
 

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Don't go!
 

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Mitsurugi?
 

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Mitsurugi is...
 

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The guy whose sword I stole and sold...
 

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This is bad. Seriously bad!
 

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Stop, Darkness! Your sword
is no match for him!
 

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Oh, come on, now!
 

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You even miss stationary
targets? How embarrassing!
 

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This girl is my ally!
 

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Darkness!
 

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Darkness, stand down!
 

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What?
 

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At least consider the time and place!
 

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You freaking hardcore pervert!
 

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Y-You should consider the time
and place yourself, Kazuma!
 

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I'm not doing anything!
 

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Oh, well. You bought me some time.
 

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Create Water!
 

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Th-That's not it! This isn't
some weird foreplay!
 

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I'm doing this ! Freeze!
 

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As long as it's harder for you
to dodge, that's enough.
 

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This is what I was really going for!
 

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Steal!
 

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Wha—
 

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Darkness!
 

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Remember! Our opponent is a dullahan.
 

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What would his weakness have been in an RPG?
 

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Watch him closely!
 

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How was he able to dodge my water so adeptly?
 

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A dullahan's weak point is...
 

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An undead monster's weak point is...
 

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Create Water!
 

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It's water!
 

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Hit him! Hit him! Damn!
 

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I'm going to run out of magic!
 

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Damn her!
 

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His weakness is water!
 

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Even a lame goddess like you must
be able to use one water spell!
 

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You can?!
 

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I'll apologize all you want later!
 

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Hurry up and do it, you useless goddess!
 

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Huh?
 

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That's enough! Enough, I said!
 

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This time, I'll steal your weapon for sure!
 

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Steal!
 

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Hey, you guys! Let's play soccer!
 

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Soccer is...
 

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A game where you handle the ball
with only your feet, not your hands!
 

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Give him a proper send-off.
 

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Yeah. Aqua!
 

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Do it.
 

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Don't hold back.
 

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We'll keep criticizing her like
this for three days or so.
 

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Things somehow worked out this time,
 

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but I think I'll lead a leisurely life,
without danger, from now on.
 

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She's drunk already!
 

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Huh? Really?
 

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Um, why only us?
 

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The radiance within me?
 

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I'm not really used to this, but it's pretty nice.
 

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Th-Three hundred million?!
 

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Group meeting!
 

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I have something to tell all of you.
 

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Now that we've acquired great wealth,
 

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I'm going to live a safe and leisurely life.
 

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I won't wait!
 

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It's not a problem!
 

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You won't earn it!
 

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I'm not going to, because I'm not a NEET!
 

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I've already made up my mind!
 

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Don't "huh" me, you useless goddess!
 

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Wait.
 

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Am I going to spend my entire life
 

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in this irrational world
with these hopeless allies?
 

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I gently closed my eyes,
 

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and firmly decided I would kill the Devil King,
 

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in order to escape from this
good-for-nothing world.
 

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Where am I?
 

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Oh, did I die again?
 

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After the battle with Verdia,
a leader in the Devil King's army,
 

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the season turned to winter.
 

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That day, I groaned wholeheartedly,
as if I were coughing up blood:
 

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I want money!
 

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Do you not get why I want more money?
 

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Debt!
 

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Thanks to the debt you've racked up,
 

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most of the reward money we earn
 

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from every quest we do is
deducted to repay those debts!
 

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Just this morning... Just this morning,
 

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when I awoke in the straw of the stable,
my eyelashes were frozen solid!
 

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If I keep sleeping in that stable,
I'm going to freeze to death for sure!
 

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You attention whore!
 

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If your feats were that astounding,
 

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then the rewards, accolades,
and debt are all yours!
 

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Pay off your debts on your own.
 

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No, we haven't started looking for work yet.
 

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Given the situation and all...
 

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The reward is well and good, but there
seriously aren't any decent quests...
 

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I'm Kazuma.
 

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Nope.
 

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Yes, I'm Kazuma.
 

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I want nothing to do with a monster
with such a dangerous-sounding name.
 

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I bet we'd die instantly if it
so much as grazed our necks.
 

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"The mobile fortress 'Destroyer' is approaching,
 

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so we are recruiting scouts to
predict the route it will take."
 

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What is this? What's a "Destroyer"?
 

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I see. I don't get it.
 

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Let's see. What's this?
 

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A Snow Sprite kill quest?
 

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Hey, what are Snow Sprites?
 

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They don't sound all that
strong, based on the name,
 

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but it says the reward is 100,000 eris each.
 

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Wow.
 

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Hey, wait.
 

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You're laughing?
 

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Why does this masochistic crusader,
who always wants to fight strong monsters,
 

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look so happy?
 

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Still, money takes priority right now!
 

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These are Snow Sprites?
 

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Hey, can't you do something
about that outfit?
 

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You look like some dumb kid going
cicada-catching in the middle of winter.
 

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I can see how this is going to play out...
 

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Darkness, what happened to your armor?
 

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Are you going to be all right in that gear?
 

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I guess a pervert with steamy thoughts
has a high body temperature to match.
 

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Number three, wait!
 

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Damn! It's darting all over!
 

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If my kill count comes out too low,
 

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I'll kill the Snow Sprites she caught, too.
 

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Now!
 

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What?
 

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All right! Wipe them all out!
 

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Hey, are you all right?
 

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Oh, nice going!
 

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It would've been a little cooler if you
weren't buried in the snow, though.
 

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What the heck?
 

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Killing Snow Sprites is totally delectable!
 

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Why doesn't everybody do this?
 

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Huh?
 

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Wh-What is that?!
 

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Sh-She's playing dead...
 

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Huh?
 

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Huh?!
 

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Stupid!
 

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Everything in this good-for-nothing world,
the people, the food, and the monsters,
 

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are all absolutely stupid!
 

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So this guy was brought to life by some
idiot who came here from Japan,
 

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whose train of thought associated
winter with the Winter Shogun?!
 

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Talk about a pain in the ass!
 

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When this is over, I'm gonna step on the girl
who's been playing dead this whole time.
 

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What is it?!
 

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The former-something-or-other who appears
to have abandoned all of her pride
 

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prostrated herself quite
magnificently, indeed.
 

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Hey, hurry and bow your head, too!
 

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You try to go off with monsters
willingly all the time!
 

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Don't show off your pointless
pride only at times like these!
 

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Huh?
 

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That's right.
 

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I was killed by the Winter Shogun.
 

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This feels familiar.
 

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Is this how it was when I met Aqua, too?
 

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Are you a goddess of this world?
 

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What's with this goddess?
 

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Is she sincerely mourning my death?
 

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She's not like that useless goddess!
 

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Y-Yes?
 

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Huh? You can do that?
 

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Seriously?!
 

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I-If possible, I'd like
 

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above-average parameters in
charm, wisdom, and strength,
 

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and I'd be even happier in a life where
a beautiful girl is my childhood friend!
 

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Wow, thank goodness!
 

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I thought it was all over,
 

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but now it feels like I pulled
through by the skin of my teeth.
 

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This is a reward for trying my hardest, right?
 

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Because my life up to now had been so awful!
 

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You said it!
 

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I reincarnated thinking I'd get to go on
a thrilling adventure, like in a game.
 

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This is like a misleading promo video, isn't it?
 

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The useless goddess who came
with me as a reincarnation perk
 

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was just an arrogant good-for-nothing.
 

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We recruited allies,
 

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but the only ones who turned up were a crazy
 

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explosion girl who fell flat
every time she used magic,
 

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and a masochistic,
 

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perverted crusader whose attacks always missed.
 

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I was an adventurer,
 

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but I did construction, side jobs,
and was forced into cabbage hunting.
 

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I was in debt deep enough to sell an
organ after defeating a boss enemy.
 

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Sleeping in the stables didn't restore my
strength, it only froze me nearly to death.
 

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Do you know how it feels to have your
eyelashes frozen solid every morning?
 

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The previous world's game balance
was beyond terrible, if you ask me.
 

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H-Huh?
 

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Why?
 

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I see.
 

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It appears
 

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I was unexpectedly fond of
that good-for-nothing world
 

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that I thought I hated...
 

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I wanted to adventure with
those girls a little longer.
 

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Huh?!
 

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Wh-What?!
 

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Oh, for real?!
 

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Is that true?
 

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Aqua!
 

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She says that according to the
laws of Heaven or whatever,
 

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I can't be revived again since
I've been reborn once before!
 

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Hey, knock it off!
 

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The face of the goddess in charge
of that backwater is twitching now!
 

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Um,
 

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she's a goddess called "Eris"...
 

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Pads?
 

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They're pads?
 

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They're really pads?!
 

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I don't mind if they're pads.
 

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Huh? Oh, uh, yes!
 

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Th-This is kind of extremely embarrassing.
 

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I want to trade this useless goddess
for that cute goddess from earlier.
 

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Goddess change!
 

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It looks like I'm all right for now.
 

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Huh?
 

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H-How was I killed?
 

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B-Beheaded?!
 

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Winter in this world is
 

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a season where only those who make
it through the struggle for survival,
 

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despite the scarce food and harsh environment,
 

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are allowed to remain alive and active.
 

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There aren't any quests beginners
like us can complete easily.
 

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Okay, retreat!
 

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Way to go, Aqua!
 

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All right, hand it over and I'll kill it.
 

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The reward for killing those is 100,000 each!
 

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She's resisting more than I expected.
 

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Oh, fine.
 

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That goddess...
 

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She mourned my death so much,
 

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and smiled kindly when I was revived.
 

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A righteous, beautiful
girl who's not an oddball!
 

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Finally, so long after I came to this world, the main heroine has appeared!