No Game, No Life - Episode 3


Episode Replay

Episode Transcript

Line Options
EXTRA : This woman, Clammy Zell, has defeated
every opponent she's faced in the tournament.
Line ID
EXTRA : Is there no one left to challenge her? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Wait, Sora. Are you serious? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : You're going to
crash the coronation?
Line ID
Sora : Our new lives here
have just begun.
Line ID
Sora : We can't get thrown out now. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...But... Line ID
Sora : All right. I'll just seize the throne, Line ID
Sora : and we'll take back
the land that was ours!
Line ID
EXTRA : Then, in accordance with the
late king's last will and testament,
Line ID
EXTRA : I will crown Clammy Zell
as our new ruler.
Line ID
EXTRA : If any object, speak now
...or forever hold your—
Line ID
Sora : Objection! Line ID
Sora : Objection! I object! Line ID
EXTRA : A-Are you saying
you wish to challenge her?
Line ID
Sora : Indeed. Line ID
Kurami Zell : You couldn't beat me, so now
you're sending your servant instead?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : This is a coronation, Stephanie Dola,
not a children's playground.
Line ID
Sora : And a coronation is no place
for con artists, wouldn't you say?
Line ID
Sora : Especially those who conspire
with foreigners to steal the throne.
Line ID
Sora : You spot any, Shiro? Line ID
Shiro : Just one. Line ID
Sora : Is anyone else hiding their ears? Line ID
Shiro : No. Line ID
Kurami Zell : I've seen that hunk of metal before. Line ID
Kurami Zell : What are you suggesting? Line ID
Sora : You don't understand? Line ID
Sora : Let's say, hypothetically of course, Line ID
Sora : that someone conspires with the elves,
uses their magic to win, and becomes the new ruler.
Line ID
Sora : This nation would be screwed, right? Line ID
EXTRA : Elves?! Line ID
EXTRA : Wh-What is the meaning of this? Line ID
Kurami Zell : Are you accusing me
of cheating, then?
Line ID
Sora : Oh, please. I just said my example
was purely hypothetical.
Line ID
Sora : Or did it strike a
little too close to home?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : All right. Line ID
Kurami Zell : If you object, Line ID
Kurami Zell : I will allow you to challenge me
to a game, just as you wish.
Line ID
Sora : Yes, please! I'd be ever so grateful! Line ID
EXTRA : ...B-But... Line ID
Sora : But if you'd like to play poker, Line ID
Sora : let's play it without
your assistant over there.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : E-Excuse me! Line ID
EXTRA : A-An elf! Line ID
EXTRA : ...Which means... Line ID
EXTRA : ...She was... Line ID
Sora : What's this? The poker-faced con artist
won't lift a finger to save her friend?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : I see. Line ID
Kurami Zell : So you colluded with some elf in an effort
to frame me for crimes against Imanity.
Line ID
Sora : Nice save. I like it. Line ID
Kurami Zell : Why don't you leave us,
my so-called elf assistant?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : I trust you will play now? Line ID
Sora : Of course. Line ID
Kurami Zell : I will determine the rules,
as per the commandments.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : I'll select a game where
cheating is impossible.
Line ID
Sora : Commandment five: The challenged party
has the right to decide how the game is played.
Line ID
Sora : Well, I'll spare you the question of why you decided
not to play poker this time, 'cause I'm just that nice!
Line ID
Sora : You're not very photogenic. Line ID
Sora : You'd be cuter if you smiled. Line ID
Kurami Zell : We'll have our game
in another location.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : I'll send for you when it's ready. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Th-Then, she was using magic on us? Line ID
Sora : Keep your voice down. Line ID
Sora : And yes. We noticed in the tavern. Line ID
Shiro : Actually, I noticed. Line ID
Sora : Let's not split hairs, Sis. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : So that mysterious device
of yours can detect magic?
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : What kind was that elf using? Line ID
Sora : Beats me. Line ID
Sora : Magic sure is amazing. Line ID
Sora : By altering face-down cards,
she can cheat without a trace.
Line ID
Sora : You play, you lose. Line ID
Sora : There's no possible way to win. Line ID
Shiro : That's why we got rid of her. Line ID
Sora : Listen. Line ID
Sora : I'll explain this as simply as I can. Line ID
Sora : First, this round-robin-style tournament
for the throne is full of holes.
Line ID
Sora : If another country wins over one of the
Imanity by promising to make them king,
Line ID
Sora : they can interfere with the games. Line ID
Sora : And given that the Imanity can't detect magic,
anyone using it is bound to win.
Line ID
Sora : Now they've got their own puppet king,
and they can do as they please with the country.
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Sora : It's so simple that
anyone could think of it.
Line ID
Sora : And do you know what the
other races would think then?
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Fil Nilvalen : I knew someone would
show up and expose us.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : Don't worry. Line ID
Kurami Zell : It's simply an Imanity who's getting
help from another race, just like me.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : This was not unexpected. Line ID
Fil Nilvalen : Clammy, will you
be okay without me?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : I'll be fine. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : So Clammy's convinced that
another race is helping us!
Line ID
Sora : Yup. She's got the idea that this is now a diplomatic
tussle between two nations vying for Elkia's throne.
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Stephanie Dola : Which means Clammy can't
rely on magic like she did before!
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Hey! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Now we can force her to play a game
where cheating is impossible, right?
Line ID
Sora : Is your head stuffed
with tulips or something?{this expression essentially means she is naive, so i'd normally use "head in the clouds" or something, but the visuals here make anything else a little difficult}
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Stephanie Dola : Why are you being mean to me? Line ID
Sora : They already expected
another country to intervene.
Line ID
Sora : They'll probably just switch to magic
that nobody can detect, or something.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Doesn't that mean we're on
even worse footing than before?
Line ID
Sora : They'll have planned out a game
that at least appears fair on the surface.
Line ID
Sora : They'll avoid using magic directly on us
like altering our memories or what we can see.
Line ID
Sora : In other words, it won't be a game
that's fundamentally impossible to win.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : So what are you saying? Line ID
Sora : As long as there's at least
...some chance of winning...
Line ID
Shiro : Blank will never lose. Line ID
Sora : There you have it. Line ID
Kurami Zell : I'll come clean with you. Line ID
Kurami Zell : I've joined forces with the elves to
secure a place for the Imanity to live.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : Once we've got the bare
minimum territory we need,
Line ID
Kurami Zell : I'll break ties with them. Line ID
Sora : Wow. Line ID
Shiro : Wow. Line ID
Sora : You didn't have to
say it out loud, you know.
Line ID
Sora : So you're spilling your plans to a potential foreign spy? Line ID
Sora : You stupid? Suicidal? Line ID
Kurami Zell : Think about it. Line ID
Kurami Zell : The Imanity can only survive by earning the
right to live under another race's protection,
Line ID
Kurami Zell : then giving up on all games and
cutting ties with the rest of the world.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : We have no choice! Line ID
Kurami Zell : Stephanie Dola, Line ID
Kurami Zell : you understand this, right? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...Well... Line ID
Kurami Zell : And Elvengarde is the largest nation in the world,
with their magic unrivaled by any other race.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : There is no way you can beat me, Line ID
Kurami Zell : so please, withdraw from the game. Line ID
Kurami Zell : I swear I won't let the elves
make me their puppet.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...Sora... Line ID
Sora : I see. Line ID
Sora : We earn the right to live under
another nation's protection.
Line ID
Sora : Not a bad plan. Line ID
Kurami Zell : ...Right? Then you'll withdraw... Line ID
Sora : But I refuse! Line ID
Sora : One of the things
that we, Blank, love best
Line ID
Sora : is saying no to people who
think they have the upper hand!
Line ID
Shiro : is saying no to people who
think they have the upper hand!
Line ID
Sora : That's number four
off our bucket list, Sis!
Line ID
Sora : We actually got to say it! Line ID
Shiro : Great job, Bro! Line ID
Kurami Zell : Looks like this was a waste of time. Line ID
Kurami Zell : I'll defeat you by force,
then, just as you wish.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : Right here. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Why? Line ID
Sora : Why what? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Why did you turn her down? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : I thought her plan made sense. Line ID
Sora : Look, isn't it about time you
learned not to be so trusting?
Line ID
Sora : Firstly, what proof do we have
that anything she said is true?
Line ID
Sora : Secondly, if she's so certain she'll win,
why did she ask us to withdraw?
Line ID
Sora : Thirdly, even if it is true, I could
be a spy from another country.
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Sora : Anyone dumb enough to tell me
all that has no business ruling anything.
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Sora : And finally, if we go along with her and she
finds out anything about us, we are screwed!
Line ID
Sora : Okay? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Wow, you put all that
thought into what you said?!
Line ID
Sora : Well, that's not all. Line ID
Sora : ...Both she and you... Line ID
Sora : are selling us humans short. Line ID
Sora : Chess? Line ID
Kurami Zell : Yes. Line ID
Kurami Zell : But this is no ordinary game of chess. Line ID
Kurami Zell : The pieces have wills of their own. Line ID
Kurami Zell : Give them orders
and they will move.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : Just say the word
and they'll do as you say.
Line ID
Sora : So that's it. Line ID
Sora : What do we do, Shiro? Line ID
Shiro : Chess is no different
from tic-tac-toe.
Line ID
Sora : Hey, we can rotate mid-game, right? Line ID
Shiro : ...Bro... Line ID
Sora : Sorry, but the two of us
are a single player.
Line ID
Sora : And this is a game that you seem
to know very well, while we don't.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : They'll never figure out the trick. Line ID
Kurami Zell : As you wish. Line ID
Shiro : Do you think I'm going to lose? Line ID
Sora : Don't get so worked up, Shiro. Line ID
Sora : You'd never lose at chess.
Not in a million games.
Line ID
Sora : But this isn't the chess you know. Line ID
Sora : Don't forget. Line ID
Sora : The two of us are a single player. Line ID
Sora : The two of us together are Blank. Line ID
Shiro : I'm sorry. Line ID
Shiro : I'll be careful. Line ID
Sora : Okay. Line ID
Kurami Zell : Are you ready? Line ID
Kurami Zell : You may make the first move. Line ID
EXTRA : Then let the game begin! Line ID
Shiro : Aschente! Line ID
Kurami Zell : Aschente! Line ID
Sora : Aschente! Line ID
Fil Nilvalen : ...Clammy... Line ID
Shiro : D-2 to D-4. Line ID
Sora : Chess favors the first player. Line ID
Sora : If both players always pick the best possible
move, the first player is more likely to win.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : It moved! Line ID
Sora : There's no way she doesn't know that. Line ID
Kurami Zell : G-7, Line ID
Kurami Zell : forward. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : I-It moved three spaces! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : That's against the rules! Line ID
Kurami Zell : I told you. Line ID
Kurami Zell : In this chess game,
the pieces have wills of their own.
Line ID
Sora : I get it. Line ID
Sora : The pieces reflect the
player's charisma, leadership,
Line ID
Sora : and potential as ruler
when they move.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : That's right. Line ID
Kurami Zell : Don't you think it's the
perfect game to decide the throne?
Line ID
Shiro : Knight to C-3. Line ID
Kurami Zell : F-7, forward. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : "Forward"? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : What kind of order is that? Line ID
Sora : Just shut up and watch. Line ID
Shiro : E-2 to E-4. Line ID
Kurami Zell : F-5, take her piece. Line ID
Sora : You mustn't forget: Line ID
Shiro : C-3, take E-4. Line ID
Sora : Once Shiro gets into a game,
her concentration is unshakable.
Line ID
Shiro : H-2 to H-3. Line ID
Shiro : Knight, take H-3. Line ID
Sora : With focus, she can
defeat anyone—even a god.
Line ID
Shiro : Queen, H-5. Line ID
Shiro : Check. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Th-That's amazing! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Clammy's almost entirely ignoring
the rules, but Shiro has her on the ropes!
Line ID
Sora : There's nothing unusual about that. Line ID
Sora : In shogi, too, a first-rate player is capable of
winning with nothing but his king and pawns.
Line ID
Sora : Breaking a few rules isn't enough
to overcome that kind of skill.
Line ID
Shiro : F-2 to F-4. Line ID
Sora : ...But... Line ID
Shiro : F-2 to F-4. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : It's not moving. Line ID
Sora : I knew it. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : What do you mean? Line ID
Sora : The key to this chess game is: Line ID
Sora : the pieces won't obey every order. Line ID
Sora : No soldier would
gladly march to his death.
Line ID
Sora : Only a level of morale that borders
on madness could make them do that.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...Then... Line ID
Sora : That's right. She can't
sacrifice any of her pieces.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : What will you do? Line ID
Kurami Zell : You're running out of time. Line ID
Shiro : Knight, take H-7. Line ID
Shiro : A-2 to A-3. Line ID
Kurami Zell : Bishop, forward.
Take the enemy knight.
Line ID
Shiro : Knight, take H-5. Line ID
Shiro : D-4 to D-5. Line ID
Shiro : ...A-3... Line ID
Shiro : ...Bishop... Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...Sh-Shiro... Line ID
Shiro : I'm sorry. Line ID
Shiro : ...Bro... Line ID
Shiro : I lost. Line ID
Shiro : I'm sorry. Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...Sora... Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Shiro! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Sora? Line ID
Sora : Attention all forces! Line ID
Sora : By my authority as king, anyone
who fights valiantly in this battle
Line ID
Sora : will earn the right to
bang any woman they like!
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : To do what?! Line ID
Sora : And all of you soldiers
fighting on the front line:
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Sora : if we win, you will be excused from further military duties Line ID
Sora : and granted an exemption
from taxes for the rest of your life
Line ID
Sora : as well as a monetary
reward from your country!
Line ID
Sora : So hear me, ye virgins: Line ID
Sora : do not fall! Line ID
Sora : And all of you who have
family or people you love,
Line ID
Sora : come back alive! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Th-That's so irresponsible! Line ID
Sora : Thanks to you, I realized that
we're not playing chess at all.
Line ID
Sora : This is a strategy game. Line ID
Sora : I'll handle the rest. Line ID
Sora : If I start to lose
my cool, help me out.
Line ID
Sora : Just you watch. Line ID
Sora : This game is right up my alley. Line ID
Sora : Pawn squad six! Line ID
Sora : The enemy is advancing
from the front line!
Line ID
Sora : Intercept them, and cut them off! Line ID
Kurami Zell : That's impossible! Line ID
Sora : Cavalry squad two! Line ID
Sora : Don't waste the opportunity
the pawns gave you!
Line ID
Sora : You, king and queen! Line ID
Sora : Get your asses to the front line! Line ID
Kurami Zell : W-Wait! It's my turn! Line ID
Sora : Huh? In a real war, what fool
waits for their enemy's "turn"?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : Pawns! Advance! Line ID
Kurami Zell : Form a defensive wall! Line ID
Sora : Look at them! Line ID
Sora : Cowards, hiding behind their soldiers! Line ID
Sora : What kind of king makes his men fight at the
front line while he sits behind them, relaxing?
Line ID
Kurami Zell : What did you say? Line ID
Sora : Listen to me, soldiers! Line ID
Sora : This battle will decide
who controls this city,
Line ID
Sora : the last bastion of
Elkia—of humanity!
Line ID
Sora : This battle will decide
the fate of our people!
Line ID
Sora : Open your eyes! Line ID
Sora : Do you really want to give rulership
of the nation to a stupid girl like her?
Line ID
Sora : ...But if we win... Line ID
Sora : She will be your queen! Line ID
Sora : This girl who, just a moment ago, Line ID
Sora : closed off her heart
to lead you to victory!
Line ID
Sora : This girl, who weeps inside because you
thought her merciless and turned away!
Line ID
Sora : And you call yourselves men?! Line ID
Kurami Zell : Wh-What is this overwhelming power? Line ID
Sora : Proud knights, bishops, and rooks! Line ID
Sora : Show me deeds befitting of your rank! Line ID
Sora : Back up the pawns
so they may do their duty!
Line ID
Kurami Zell : This is impossible! Line ID
Sora : That's right. Line ID
Sora : You're using elf magic to artificially
boost your own troops' morale.
Line ID
Sora : You explain it all away by saying
you have more charisma than we do.
Line ID
Sora : Of course. It's the
perfect way to cheat.
Line ID
Sora : But you made one big mistake. Line ID
Kurami Zell : What? Line ID
Sora : Throughout all of history, Line ID
Sora : no wise king has ever forced his army
to obey him through oppression.
Line ID
Sora : People will only truly
fight for what is right.
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Sora : And there is only one thing
that is truly right in this world!
Line ID
Kurami Zell : One thing that's truly right? Line ID
Sora : The one shining beacon of righteousness
...that will always guide us...
Line ID
Sora : is cuteness! Line ID
Sora : Cute makes right! Line ID
Sora : All our needs, desires,
and instincts seek cuteness,
Line ID
Sora : and for cuteness we will
give everything we have!
Line ID
Sora : That's just the way men are! Line ID
Kurami Zell : ...That... That's not... Line ID
Kurami Zell : As long as I don't know which race is helping
them, there's a chance they'll find me out.
Line ID
Kurami Zell : ... But... Line ID
Kurami Zell : I have no choice! Line ID
Kurami Zell : King to E-6! Line ID
Sora : What? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : What happened to that piece? Line ID
Sora : This is bad. Line ID
Sora : Retreat! Line ID
Sora : All forces retreat! Line ID
Sora : The enemy is using
brainwashing magic!
Line ID
Kurami Zell : He found out? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Wh-What's happening? Line ID
Sora : Just don't let them touch you! Line ID
Kurami Zell : It's okay. They don't have proof. Line ID
Sora : Hurry up and retreat! Line ID
Kurami Zell : And if they can't prove I'm cheating, Line ID
Sora : Retreat! Line ID
Kurami Zell : I win! Line ID
Kurami Zell : All forces, advance! Line ID
Sora : Crap! Line ID
Sora : ... Crap, crap, crap, crap... Line ID
Sora : I screwed up big time! Line ID
Sora : I thought she only had one trick up her sleeve
and failed to consider any other possibilities.
Line ID
Sora : I just made the same mistake
I lectured Steph about!
Line ID
Sora : Why couldn't I put the
final piece in the puzzle?
Line ID
Shiro : ...Brother... Line ID
Kurami Zell : Bring me the enemy king's head, queen. Line ID
Kurami Zell : This is checkmate. Line ID
Sora : Queen! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...Wha— Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Sora! Line ID
Sora : Queen, put down your sword. Line ID
Sora : ...You are... Line ID
Sora : far too beautiful! Line ID
Shiro : Huh? Line ID
Stephanie Dola : Huh? Line ID
Kurami Zell : Huh? Line ID
Sora : ...Oh, queen... Line ID
Sora : Just once, consider this: Line ID
Sora : is that king worthy of your service? Line ID
Sora : That king who brainwashes his soldiers,
uses them as weapons and tools,
Line ID
Sora : and even forces you to
bear the brunt of the assault?
Line ID
Sora : Is he worthy of your sword? Line ID
Sora : Please reconsider! Line ID
Sora : Who are your people? Line ID
Sora : Who are those you must protect? Line ID
Sora : Dating sims are one of the few genres
at which I'm better than my sister.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : He got us the enemy queen! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : He's turned the whole game around! Line ID
Shiro : No. Line ID
Shiro : They're using magic that lets them brainwash
the other pieces just by touching them.
Line ID
Shiro : Adding one piece to
our ranks changes nothing.
Line ID
Stephanie Dola : ...No... Line ID
Sora : What now? What are you
gonna do, eighteen-year-old virgin?
Line ID
Sora : ... There is still a way to win, but... Line ID
Sora : If she doesn't try to break
out of this, we're done!
Line ID
Sora : Or is it too dangerous to wait for her? Line ID
Sora : Maybe I should make the next move. Line ID
Sora : No! What do I do? Line ID
Sora : There's no time to correct my mistake
...and come up with something el—
Line ID
Shiro : Bro. Line ID
Sora : Shiro? Line ID
Shiro : The two of us are Blank together. Line ID
Shiro : We'll be fine. Line ID
Kurami Zell : No. I mustn't be intimidated. Line ID
Kurami Zell : Knight! Slay the traitorous queen! Line ID
Sora : She took the bait! Line ID
Shiro : She took the bait! Line ID
Kurami Zell : Knight, what's wrong? Line ID
Sora : This is it! Line ID
Sora : This is how we can win! Line ID
Sora : Shiro, you command the army! Line ID
Sora : Keep their forces
from brainwashing us!
Line ID
Shiro : Piece of cake! Line ID
Stephanie Dola : What are you going to do? Line ID
Sora : You know what, Steph? Line ID
Sora : There's more than one way to win a game. Line ID
Sora : ...You can win... Line ID
Sora : without fighting at all! Line ID
EXTRA : How can you not take
this game seriously?
Line ID
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