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Episode Replay

Episode Transcript

EXTRA : In this world, there are humans, (0:00:12.82)
EXTRA : elves, fairies, beastmen, (0:00:15.98)
EXTRA : monsters, spirits, angels, and demons. (0:00:20.66)
EXTRA : Truly, a melting pot of sentient creatures. (0:00:27.79)
EXTRA : As such, this wonderful world bursting with diversity... (0:00:41.61)
EXTRA : Come again, okay? (0:00:47.90)
EXTRA : S-Sure. (0:00:49.77)
EXTRA : C'mere, handsome! (0:00:50.86)
EXTRA : H-Hey... (0:00:53.19)
EXTRA : ...is, naturally, bursting with a diverse selection of brothels. (0:00:54.82)
EXTRA : The girls who work at said brothels are called "succu-girls." (0:01:00.58)
EXTRA : The law allows succubi to pursue this occupation by law purely on the basis of their species. (0:01:06.08)
EXTRA : There are plenty who don't look much like succubi at all, (0:01:11.56)
EXTRA : but nearly everyone has succubus blood in them if their line is traced back far enough, (0:01:14.09)
EXTRA : or so the convenient line of logic goes. (0:01:18.05)
EXTRA : Well, let's set aside the niceties for now: (0:01:21.47)
EXTRA : All creatures are bound by their instincts, (0:01:23.49)
EXTRA : and as such, the Succubus District is, once again, bustling with customers. (0:01:25.85)
Elma : Thank you so much for coming today. (0:01:31.86)
Elma : Come again soon, Stunkie! (0:01:34.74)
Stunk : Yeah, I'll be back. (0:01:37.21)
Stunk : Man, elves really are the best! They're all young and hot! (0:01:47.55)
Zel : Yo, Stunk. (0:01:51.88)
Stunk : Hey, Zel. (0:01:54.63)
Zel : Dude, did you seriously just sleep with that elf just now? (0:01:56.09)
Stunk : Zel (Elf) (0:01:57.59)
Stunk : Hell yeah, it was awesome! (0:02:01.21)
Zel : You've gotta be kidding! (0:02:02.92)
Zel : She's over 500 years old! (0:02:04.59)
Stunk : So? (0:02:06.46)
Zel : She's, like, an old hag! I can't believe you can sleep with that! (0:02:07.62)
Stunk : She looks young, and she's pretty damn cute to a human like me, so I've got no complaints. (0:02:10.63)
Zel : Really? What about that is cute? (0:02:15.15)
Zel : I seriously don't get you humans. (0:02:18.88)
Mitsue : Oh, my! (0:02:21.99)
Mitsue : Is that my little Zel-Zel? (0:02:23.84)
Zel : Hey, Mitsue-san! (0:02:27.27)
Mitsue : I haven't seen you in ages! (0:02:30.17)
Mitsue : You really should come— (0:02:32.46)
Zel : Ages? C'mon, we had some fun together just three months ago! (0:02:34.34)
Mitsue : Oh, you know three months is ages to a human! (0:02:38.96)
Zel : Well then, why don't we go have some fun later tonight? (0:02:44.22)
Mitsue : Really? That sounds wonderful! (0:02:47.05)
Zel : We can spend all night together. (0:02:49.38)
Mitsue : I'll be waiting. (0:02:52.05)
Mitsue : I can hardly stand the wait! (0:02:55.53)
Zel : Man, nothing beats humans.
None of 'em are over a hundred.
(0:03:01.30)
EXTRA : Meidri, can I get a refill? (0:04:37.92)
Meidri : Yes, coming right up! (0:04:40.38)
Stunk : Look, your taste in women is just plain weird. (0:04:45.30)
Zel : No way! Like I've said for a whole century, it's humans who have the weirdest taste! (0:04:48.14)
Stunk : Elves are cute no matter how old they are. What don't you like about 'em? (0:04:52.84)
Zel : Their mana's old and rotten! How do you not know that?! (0:04:56.38)
Stunk : The hell?! How am I supposed to know about their mana?! (0:04:59.05)
Zel : You just are! (0:05:01.09)
Stunk : Excuse me?! (0:05:02.21)
Stunk : Okay, if you're gonna be this damn stubborn, we'll settle it once and for all! (0:05:04.55)
Stunk : Brooz! Kanchal! (0:05:08.38)
Stunk : You guys go out to the Succubus District every night, right? (0:05:13.59)
Brooz : H-Hey, moron! (0:05:17.92)
Kanchal : Don't shout it out! (0:05:19.45)
Stunk : Shut it! Who cares about that crap?! (0:05:21.01)
Stunk : Right now, I need you to write a review! With numbers! (0:05:23.17)
Brooz : A review? (0:05:27.42)
Kanchal : With numbers? (0:05:28.75)
Stunk : Yup! (0:05:29.77)
Zel : You'll be reviewing a 500-year-old elf versus a 50-year-old human succu-girl. (0:05:30.51)
Stunk : C'mon, now! (0:05:35.69)
Stunk : This'll bring the truth to light: (0:05:40.34)
Stunk : that a 500-year-old elf is way better! (0:05:42.01)
Stunk : You're gonna read 'em and weep! (0:05:44.42)
Zel : I dunno about that. (0:05:45.98)
Brooz : Here. (0:05:48.01)
Kanchal : I'm all done. (0:05:48.86)
Stunk : Okay, let's have a look. (0:05:49.71)
Stunk : With their exquisite beauty, elves truly are the finest women of all the species! (0:05:56.55)
Stunk : A 500-year-old elf woman might sound old, but she looks young and hot, (0:05:59.76)
Stunk : so who cares about her age?! (0:06:02.96)
Stunk : I'm givin' her a 9 out of 10 points! (0:06:05.01)
Stunk : A 50-year-old succu-girl's got lots of experience, so yeah, (0:06:08.71)
Stunk : she can get me to finish, but I ain't that thrilled about it. (0:06:12.76)
Zel : No freakin' way! A 500-year-old elf is way older than my mom! (0:06:17.84)
Zel : There's no way I could fuck that! (0:06:21.13)
Zel : Have a little class! (0:06:22.59)
Zel : Fifty-year-old human girls are supposedly "old," (0:06:24.98)
Zel : but the life force inside of them is so rich and hearty, (0:06:28.63)
Zel : and they're real good at what they do! How can you not like that? (0:06:30.71)
Brooz : They might look cute, but a 500-year-old elf smells old and stale, kind of like mulch. (0:06:36.05)
Brooz : Smell is real important, you know! (0:06:41.76)
Brooz : If you look at them like they're a plump orc girl, they're pretty damn cute. (0:06:45.67)
Brooz : And they're way softer than an orc girl. Suffice it to say, I like 'em. (0:06:49.65)
Piltia : That's basically an old hag... (0:06:55.21)
Piltia : I like elves, but they can get to be 800 years old, so, y'know... (0:06:56.67)
Piltia : Sorry, but I'd pass on this one. (0:07:00.92)
Piltia : This one's an old hag, too. (0:07:04.15)
Piltia : I'd pass on her, too. (0:07:06.01)
Piltia : Still, she's better than the elf, so... (0:07:07.76)
EXTRA : I see, I see. (0:07:12.96)
EXTRA : Yeah, yeah. (0:07:14.17)
EXTRA : Not surprised. (0:07:15.67)
EXTRA : That's about right. (0:07:17.09)
Zel : See, you're the only one who rated the elf higher. (0:07:18.42)
Stunk : Really? (0:07:22.46)
Zel : Ooh, I've gotta go see Mitsue-san! (0:07:23.46)
Zel : See ya! (0:07:26.55)
Stunk : I said it yesterday and I'll say it again, (0:07:30.71)
Stunk : your taste in women is damn weird. (0:07:32.92)
Zel : C'mon now, the reviews didn't lie! (0:07:35.47)
Zel : You're the weird one. (0:07:39.01)
Zel : You get your taste in women from your old man? (0:07:41.13)
Stunk : My old man, eh? Guess we share somethin' in common. (0:07:44.01)
Stunk : He was a real bastard, but he did like his harems. (0:07:48.38)
Zel : That's not like your taste at all. (0:07:53.05)
Zel : I'm telling you, you like the weirdest shit. (0:07:54.96)
Stunk : C'mon, the weird thing is— (0:07:57.26)
Zel : Get 'em, Stunk! (0:08:50.92)
Stunk : On it! (0:08:52.34)
Stunk : Hey, you all right, kid? (0:09:18.76)
Stunk : You an angel? Never seen one of you before. (0:09:24.13)
Zel : Damn, same here, and I've been around over 200 years. (0:09:28.76)
Zel : They're pretty rare. (0:09:33.05)
Stunk : Right then, you take care. (0:09:34.97)
Crimvael : Huh? P-Please, wait! (0:09:37.09)
Crimvael : You seem to be adventurers, and quite skilled ones, at that! (0:09:41.46)
Crimvael : Would it be all right if I traveled by your side for a while? (0:09:44.84)
Crimvael : You see, because my angel halo broke, I can't use my powers. (0:09:50.26)
Crimvael : More importantly, it means I can't go back to Heaven. (0:09:56.13)
Crimvael : So while I wait for it to heal... (0:09:59.05)
Crimvael : I know it's a selfish thing to ask, but... (0:10:02.63)
Stunk : You can go back to Heaven when your halo heals up, is that it? (0:10:12.30)
Crimvael : Huh? Y-Yeah! (0:10:15.42)
Stunk : Okay! When it heals up, you take us to Heaven, (0:10:17.09)
Stunk : but until then, we'll help you as best we can! (0:10:22.13)
Crimvael : R-Really? Thank you so much, truly, thank you! (0:10:25.39)
Crimvael : But why do you want to go to Heaven? (0:10:31.05)
Stunk : We're just dying to know... (0:10:35.42)
Zel : ...if they've got brothels in Heaven. (0:10:38.17)
Crimvael : What? (0:10:43.42)
Stunk : You see, we're... (0:10:45.13)
Zel : ...on a fantastic journey to have sex with every type of girl out there! (0:10:46.14)
Stunk : Be it jungle! (0:10:49.42)
Zel : The sea! (0:10:50.25)
Stunk : The desert! (0:10:51.50)
Zel : The snowiest peaks! (0:10:52.75)
Stunk : The deepest dungeons! (0:10:54.30)
Zel : High and low, near and far, we set forth for adventure! (0:10:55.25)
Zel : And if there are cute girls to be found there... (0:10:59.42)
Stunk : ...through Heaven and Hell, we'll come for them! (0:11:01.40)
Crimvael : Uh... Huh? (0:11:04.21)
Stunk : Oh, man, I'm so excited! (0:11:05.64)
Stunk : Boy, the day I get to have sex with an angel, I'll know I'm truly in Paradise, (0:11:07.80)
Stunk : every meaning of it! (0:11:10.92)
Stunk : Going to Heaven... (0:11:13.38)
Stunk : More like coming to Heaven! (0:11:15.14)
Zel : You never know, maybe God herself is workin' up there! (0:11:17.17)
Stunk : Oh my God ! Dream big! (0:11:20.11)
Zel : Long live our sexy utopia! (0:11:22.26)
Crimvael : I... I feel like I've asked for help from some extremely dubious folks... (0:11:25.11)
Stunk : Oh, yeah. (0:11:29.34)
Stunk : You're a guy... right? (0:11:30.76)
Stunk : You've done it with a bunch of angel ladies then, huh? (0:11:33.63)
Crimvael : I-I'm a boy! Of course I am! (0:11:36.67)
Crimvael : L-Look, I've got a bulge, right? (0:11:40.48)
Stunk : Oh. Okay. (0:11:43.97)
Stunk : Right, let's get on our way to town, yeah? (0:11:45.96)
Crimvael : I actually have both, (0:11:50.09)
Crimvael : but if I told them that, they might try something funny with me... (0:11:52.26)
Zel : Oh, hey, since you're here, we'll treat ya, kiddo. (0:11:54.96)
Crimvael : Treat me? To dinner? (0:11:58.82)
Zel : No, man, to a succu-girl! C'mon, let's go! (0:12:01.70)
Crimvael : Wha... (0:12:04.95)
Crimvael : What ?! (0:12:06.70)
Crimvael : No, no, no, no, hold on, please! (0:12:08.45)
Crimvael : I've never been to that sort of establishment, let alone done it! (0:12:11.59)
Zel : Ooh, so it's your first time? (0:12:15.05)
Stunk : All the more reason to treat ya. (0:12:16.84)
Crimvael : Hey, guys! (0:12:20.26)
Crimvael : Um, uh... (0:12:26.72)
Crimvael : I was under the assumption that such lascivious behavior was, uh... (0:12:29.97)
Crimvael : frowned upon, so... (0:12:32.80)
Crimvael : So, uh... (0:12:35.21)
Stunk : We're here. (0:12:37.88)
Stunk : It's been a hot minute since I've been to Meow Meow Paradise. (0:12:39.66)
Zel : I'm gonna ask for Mokko, so don't you dare steal her, okay? (0:12:43.07)
Stunk : I won't. I like Karuru, y'know. (0:12:46.57)
Stunk : 'Sup, ladies? (0:12:50.43)
Crimvael : U-Uhh, actually, uh... (0:12:51.63)
EXTRA : Welco-meow! (0:12:55.59)
Crimvael : First of all, I'm an angel, so... (0:12:58.09)
Stunk : I'll have Karuru, he'll take Mokko, (0:12:58.46)
Stunk : and it's his first time, so find him someone nice, yeah? (0:13:01.88)
Crimvael : Um, I mean, I'm not... (0:13:04.23)
EXTRA : Sounds purr-fect. Let's see... (0:13:04.59)
Crimvael : And honestly, I think you should do something like this w-with the one you love... (0:13:07.59)
Crimvael : U-Uh, I... (0:13:14.10)
Mii : I've never been with an angel before. (0:13:16.60)
Mii : This your first time coming to a place like this? (0:13:19.86)
Crimvael : Y-Yes. (0:13:22.63)
Crimvael : I mean, uh, I don't know what to do... (0:13:24.36)
Crimvael : I mean, I'm not... (0:13:27.63)
Mii : Wanna take a shower? (0:13:29.77)
Mii : Just let this kitten take care of you, okay? (0:13:34.87)
Crimvael : Okay... (0:13:38.46)
Mii : Thank mew very much! (0:13:42.88)
Mii : Come again soon! (0:13:45.17)
Stunk : Yep, catgirls are awesome! They're so cute! (0:13:46.30)
Zel : Boy, humans really love cat ears, huh? (0:13:49.97)
Zel : Right then, where to next? (0:13:53.10)
Zel : Somewhere with girls we've never tried before. (0:13:56.42)
Stunk : Yeah, let's take a look. (0:13:58.80)
Crimvael : Oh, boy... I've really done it... (0:14:01.26)
Crimvael : In every meaning of the word... I've done it all... (0:14:04.01)
Crimvael : All in one go... (0:14:06.92)
EXTRA : The party was joined by a pure, undefiled angel... (0:14:08.38)
EXTRA : ...who was immediately defiled. (0:14:11.30)
EXTRA : Later, Stunk introduced Crim to the
Ale 'n Eats where they started working.
(0:14:14.38)
Crimvael : Thank you for waiting! (0:14:22.92)
EXTRA : Thanks, Crim! (0:14:24.34)
EXTRA : This is a bulletin board for adventurers. (0:14:27.34)
EXTRA : Here, patrons can post rare and helpful information they've learned on their adventures. (0:14:31.21)
EXTRA : This not only helps adventurers make a name for themselves, (0:14:35.13)
EXTRA : but earn some cash, too, as valuable bulletins are sold to be posted in other establishments. (0:14:37.70)
EXTRA : Stunk gave 'em a seven, Zel was a six, Samtahn said eight... (0:14:46.16)
EXTRA : Everyone gave them high scores. (0:14:51.76)
EXTRA : Slippery and slimy... (0:14:54.33)
EXTRA : "The Pinnacle of Passion"... (0:14:55.75)
EXTRA : Kanchal's review's off. A four? (0:14:59.31)
EXTRA : "The squirming tentacles were way too heavy. I felt like I was being tied up and tortured." (0:15:03.34)
Kanchal : Ow, ow, ow, ow! (0:15:10.59)
Kanchal : This hurts! (0:15:15.63)
Kanchal : You're gonna—you're gonna peel it off! (0:15:16.63)
Kanchal : Hey, are you listening to me?! (0:15:19.02)
Kanchal : Ow! This really hurts! (0:15:21.77)
Kanchal : You're being too rough! (0:15:24.26)
Kanchal : Hey, could you please listen to— (0:15:26.09)
EXTRA : "As someone who enjoys being delicately toyed with, much like a master thief disabling traps, (0:15:31.67)
EXTRA : I can say that this type of sex was not for me. Hard pass." (0:15:37.20)
EXTRA : Incredibly good to know. (0:15:40.71)
EXTRA : Wait, aren't you still a virgin? (0:15:42.46)
EXTRA : I'm merely collecting information to aid me when the promised time comes. (0:15:44.88)
EXTRA : Ooh, wonder if they'll go to an underwater shrine next? (0:15:48.51)
EXTRA : Hey, Meidri, you got back issues of Stunk's reviews? (0:15:51.88)
Zel : Let's hit up a place where the girls've got tons of mana. (0:15:58.39)
Stunk : Look, you know I don't know what— (0:16:01.80)
Meidri : Hey, Stunk and Zel. (0:16:03.09)
Meidri : This is for you. (0:16:05.26)
Stunk : Hmm? What's this about? (0:16:06.53)
Meidri : Your pay for the article you posted. (0:16:07.98)
Meidri : Everyone's taking a copy. (0:16:10.63)
Meidri : God, men are the worst. (0:16:13.70)
Stunk : I had no idea that little opinion piece would earn us gold. (0:16:15.20)
Stunk : And a whole pile of it, at that! (0:16:18.45)
Meidri : What're you gonna do with all that money? (0:16:20.83)
Zel : What are we gonna do with it? (0:16:23.17)
Stunk : You know what we're gonna do. (0:16:24.55)
Zel : We're gonna go review a new species! (0:16:26.55)
Stunk : We're gonna go review a new species! (0:16:26.55)
Stunk : It's our job, after all! (0:16:29.38)
Zel : Yep, it's hard work! (0:16:31.01)
Stunk : Okay, let's figure out where we're headed to next! (0:16:32.26)
Stunk : I heard a mermaid joint opened up, how's that sound? (0:16:35.01)
Zel : Dude, we just did a dagon. Can we go for something non-aquatic? (0:16:37.30)
Stunk : You categorize them by type?{i guess the translator is more hip than me because i have no idea what this means} (0:16:42.13)
Stunk : Hey, Crim. (0:16:44.76)
Crimvael : Yes, would you like to order something? (0:16:46.15)
Stunk : You get paid for your work here soon, right? Wanna come with? (0:16:48.67)
Crimvael : Huh? Come where? (0:16:53.03)
Crimvael : U-Uh, actually... (0:16:56.45)
Stunk : You have to take a load off sometime, you know. (0:16:58.63)
Zel : More like bust out a load, am I right? (0:17:00.80)
Meidri : Ugh, no, thank you—that's so gross, ew. (0:17:04.96)
Meidri : Keep it to yourselves. (0:17:08.59)
Stunk : What's that, Meidri, dear? (0:17:10.17)
Stunk : You jealous? (0:17:12.13)
Stunk : If so, I can give you a private review tonight— (0:17:13.51)
EXTRA : And so, Stunk, Zel, and Crim set forth on a quest to find a new species to review, (0:17:19.67)
EXTRA : and two weeks passed. (0:17:25.19)
EXTRA : I haven't seen Stunk and Zel around lately. (0:17:28.17)
EXTRA : Just how far did they go to get it on? (0:17:31.42)
Meidri : It's been two weeks. (0:17:34.01)
Meidri : That is a bit long to be gone. I'm a little worried... (0:17:35.76)
Meidri : Wait, why am I worried about those perverts?! (0:17:39.34)
Meidri : Ugh, I'm such an idiot! (0:17:43.34)
Meidri : I'm just a little worried about Crim! (0:17:44.80)
Meidri : It's busy around here without him. (0:17:47.63)
Stunk : Ho there! Excuse the long absence, fine citizens! (0:17:52.92)
EXTRA : You get that nut out? (0:17:55.92)
Stunk : Oh, you betcha! (0:17:58.17)
EXTRA : Where the hell'd you go this time? (0:18:00.12)
Stunk : You'll have to see the review to— (0:18:02.20)
Stunk : Oh, Meidri, can ya put this up for us? (0:18:04.17)
Meidri : I swear... (0:18:10.12)
Meidri : They're just as disgusting as always.
I can't believe I was worried about them.
(0:18:12.05)
Meidri : Birdmaids: Just like parakeets, the back of their neck is sensitive. (0:18:17.26)
Meidri : Their all-in-one cloaca feels fantastic. (0:18:21.95)
Meidri : One of, if not, the lewdest species?! (0:18:26.71)
Zel : Eldri, the Birdmaid! (0:18:32.14)
Stunk : Birdmaids are unfathomably sensitive. (0:18:47.55)
Stunk : Every move you make on them, they cheep and squeal. (0:18:53.52)
Stunk : It's like I've got my own pet birdie! (0:18:56.01)
Stunk : And that voice is so sweet and adorable—and hot damn, is it sexy! (0:19:00.13)
Stunk : The room was my own private orchestra hall, hosting her lewd moans! (0:19:07.69)
Stunk : I'll tell you this, my Li'l Stunk gave her a standing ovation! (0:19:10.55)
Zel : Have you ever had a pet parakeet? (0:19:14.21)
Zel : You know how when they like you a lot, they'll land on your hand and try to hump it? (0:19:16.76)
Zel : So here's what I'm getting at... (0:19:21.30)
Zel : Birds are total horndogs! (0:19:23.64)
Zel : Parakeet? More like gonna skeet! They're awesome! (0:19:26.39)
Crimvael : Their pretty wings feel very different from mine. I liked that a lot... (0:19:36.42)
Crimvael : But they're very submissive, and I'm not very dominant, so it was a little hard for me... (0:19:41.49)
Crimvael : Taking a bath with them in the cold waters in the forest lake feels nice. (0:19:49.17)
Crimvael : But... (0:19:56.63)
Crimvael : I don't know who would actually ask to sand bathe with them... (0:19:59.09)
EXTRA : So I'm a Lamia... (0:20:05.34)
EXTRA : They said "no snakes," (0:20:08.96)
EXTRA : and turned me away. (0:20:10.84)
EXTRA : I really wanted to wrap myself around them, too... (0:20:12.88)
EXTRA : Talk about cold-blooded. (0:20:15.71)
Meidri : Wha... Wha... (0:20:21.26)
EXTRA : Back of the neck, huh? (0:20:23.88)
EXTRA : Real sensitive, eh? (0:20:25.26)
EXTRA : They got a cloaca. (0:20:27.00)
EXTRA : Yet another nugget of knowledge obtained. (0:20:28.63)
Meidri : Stunk! Zel! Crim! (0:20:31.20)
Zel : H-Hey, it wasn't our idea to go after a birdmaid! (0:20:34.10)
Meidri : You little bastards... (0:20:38.09)
Stunk : The good part's right around the nape of your neck, huh? (0:20:42.76)
Zel : W-Welp, Mitsue's waitin' on me, so I'm out! (0:20:56.69)
Crimvael : S-Stunk, are you okay? (0:21:01.76)
Stunk : Owww! I just touched you for a second! (0:21:04.91)
Stunk : Dammit, where the hell did Meidri go?! (0:21:08.71)
Crimvael : Hey, where are you... Everyone, hold him back! (0:21:11.76)
EXTRA : And so, the Interspecies Reviewers were founded. (0:21:17.05)
Mitsue : Listen up, girls, age means nothing to a woman. (0:23:04.48)
Mitsue : A good woman never wilts, no matter how old she gets. (0:23:09.74)
Mitsue : She is always in full bloom! (0:23:15.42)

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