Forms follow function, and often obliterate it.

Forsan et haec olim meminisse juvabit.

FORTH IF HONK THEN

FORTRAN is a good example of a language
which is easier to parse using ad hoc techniques.
		-- D. Gries
		   [What's good about it?  Ed.]

FORTRAN is not a flower but a weed -- it is hardy,
occasionally blooms, and grows in every computer.
		-- Alan J. Perlis

FORTRAN is the language of Powerful Computers.
		-- Steven Feiner

FORTRAN rots the brain.
		-- John McQuillin

FORTRAN, "the infantile disorder", by now nearly 20 years old, is hopelessly
inadequate for whatever computer application you have in mind today: it is
too clumsy, too risky, and too expensive to use.
		-- Edsger W. Dijkstra, SIGPLAN Notices, Volume 17, Number 5

[FORTRAN] will persist for some time --
probably for at least the next decade.
		-- T. Cheatham

Fortunate is he for whom the belle toils.

Fortunately, the responsibility for providing evidence is on the part of
the person making the claim, not the critic.  It is not the responsibility
of UFO skeptics to prove that a UFO has never existed, nor is it the
responsibility of paranormal-health-claims skeptics to prove that crystals
or colored lights never healed anyone.  The skeptic's role is to point out
claims that are not adequately supported by acceptable evidence and to
provide plausible alternative explanations that are more in keeping with
the accepted body of scientific evidence.
		-- Thomas L. Creed, The Skeptical Inquirer, Vol. XII,
		   No. 2, pg. 215

Fortune and love befriend the bold.
		-- Ovid

FORTUNE ANSWERS THE TOUGH QUESTIONS: #3

Q:	Why haven't you graduated yet?
A:	Well, Dad, I could have finished years ago, but I wanted
	my dissertation to rhyme.

FORTUNE ANSWERS THE TOUGH QUESTIONS: #8

Q:	Is God a myth?
A:	No, He's a mythter.

fortune: cannot execute.  Out of cookies.

fortune: cpu time/usefulness ratio too high -- core dumped.

FORTUNE DISCUSSES THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN:	#14

Low Blows:
	Let's say a man and woman are watching a boxing match on TV.  One
of the boxers is felled by a low blow.  The woman says "Oh, gee.  That must
hurt." The man doubles over and actually FEELS the pain.

Dressing Up:
	A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the
garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail.  A man will dress up
for: weddings, funerals.  Speaking of weddings, when reminiscing about
weddings, women talk about "the ceremony".  Men laugh about "the bachelor
party".

David Letterman:
	Men think David Letterman is the funniest man on the face of the
Earth.  Women think he is a mean, semi-dorky guy who always has a bad
haircut.

FORTUNE DISCUSSES THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN:	#16

Relationships:
	First of all, a man does not call a relationship a relationship -- he
refers to it as "that time when me and Suzie were doing it on a semi-regular
basis".
	When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to
her girlfriends, and she will write a poem titled "All Men Are Idiots".  Then
she will get on with her life.
	A man has a little more trouble letting go.  Six months after the
breakup, at 3:00 a.m. on a Saturday night, he will call and say, "I just
wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I'll never forgive you, and I
hate you, and you're a total floozy.  But I want you to know that there's
always a chance for us".  This is known as the "I Hate You / I Love You"
drunken phone call, that 99% if all men have made at least once.  There are
community colleges that offer courses to help men get over this need; alas,
these classes rarely prove effective.

FORTUNE DISCUSSES THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN:	#17

Shoes:
	 The average man has 4 pairs of footwear: running shoes, dress shoes,
boots, and slippers.  The average woman has shoes 4 layers thick on the floor
of her closet.  Most of them hurt her feet.

Making friends:
	 A woman will meet another woman with common interests, do a few things
together, and say something like, "I hope we can be good friends."
	A man will meet another man with common interests, do a few things
together, and say nothing.  After years of interacting with this other man,
sharing hopes and fears that he wouldn't confide in his priest or
psychiatrist, he'll finally let down his guard in a fit of drunken
sentimentality and say something like, "You know, for someone who's such a
jerk, I guess you're OK."

FORTUNE DISCUSSES THE DIFFERENCES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN:	#2

Desserts:
	A woman will generally admire an ornate dessert for the artistic
work it is, praising its creator and waiting a suitable interval before
she reluctantly takes a small sliver off one edge.  A man will start by
grabbing the cherry in the center.

Car repair:
	The average man thinks his Y chromosome contains complete repair
manuals for every car made since World War II.  He will work on a problem
himself until it either goes away or turns into something that "can't be
fixed without special tools".
	The average woman thinks "that funny thump-thump noise" is an
accurate description of an automotive problem.  She will, however, have the
car serviced at the proper intervals and thereby incur fewer problems than
the average man.